The Future of Intelligent Appliances

Dear Insured Party ,

 We understand and sympathise with your recent automobile accident and your application for compensation for injuries and depression.

   Unfortunately , as per your agreement , we have examined your facebook account and internet access patterns and have determined you do not meet our standards of disabled, dispite your inability to go back to work , and so your application , as you have already been informed, has been denied.

since you have decided to continue legal action in this matter , as per our written agreement , we have turned over all information from your internet , and your intelligent appliances , to various authorities. We have noticed more than a thousand illegally copied mp3 songs and amost two hundred movies on your external hard drive , and your television seems to be set exclusively to pornographic channels. As this may be a technical error , we have also sent your wife a copy of this report , along with pictures taken from your computer's camera while you were unclothed, watching those pornographic movies.

You can expect letters of copy write violation from the RSA shortly.

Also , we have informed your credit card corperation of your lack of employment and the decision to deny your application , thus resulting in you having no income. You have no doubt noticed they cancelled the cards already.

Since the appartment building you live in is one we have a financial interest in (ie: we've insured it) we have informed your land lord as well that you have no income and are unlikely to make next months rent.

Thank you for your business.

Your Insurance Company.


(They're already getting lawyers to get access to your face book account. This isn't as far a stretch as you think)